Well, it turns out deployment can completely turn your head. I'm still here and still fighting the good fight, now 1/3 left!
I was working for a few months and that seemed to really take over my life. Grocery shopping and eating were more of a struggle then I recall them ever being before. Then they said that they wanted me to give them even more time and I balked. And then I called some people and figured out that they were under paying me AND failing to make other legal financial obligations and so I decided that I was over it. I wasn't really even liking the work and decided that the enormous stress and anxiety were not worth being underpaid etc. So I left at the end of my contract.
That takes me to now. Basically. There were some interesting things and trips in between like a wedding, bridal shower, and bachelorette party (all the fun, none of the responsibility!), visits with friends, visits from family, a trip to the zoo, some football games, and a new deployment GF.
But before you think that deployment is all glamour, I should say that most of my nights are spent watching obscene amounts of television because it's the least painful way to quickly get through an entire evening. I go out and do something less than 1 night a week, and now that I'm doing my thing from home, that means pretty minimal human contract. Try to imagine only talking to another person, face-to-face, for an hour a week. I have a love hate relationship with my computer because it's my main outlet to the outside world but it refuses to satisfy my desires or even engage with me. I carry my phone with me pretty much everywhere. No good reason since the BF has never called without a heads up at least a day in advance, but just in case.... of...something? Every single time it beeps, my heart races because it might finally be an email from him. On a good day, like where I already checked his email and know that he isn't in the middle of writing anything so it can't possibly be him that caused my phone to chirp, I can wait about 5 minutes before I check just to be sure. I am a slave to my phone.
Basically, it sucks. I can think of nothing to recommend it. And at the end, I'm going to look back and I'm going to wonder what the hell did I do for an entire half of a year of my life. I can't seem to stop, but once I can, I'm going to be really pissed that I spent the entire time just waiting for him to come back. Try to imagine being 8 years old and starting your Christmas countdown/preparations on May 25th. You can miss out on so much other great stuff because all you can think about is Christmas. Not to mention, it's exhausting to be waiting that eagerly for that long.
The one good thing that came of all this is that decided to start running a few weeks ago and I'm not in week 4 of C25k. This is the farthest I've ever gotten in the past because it involves running for 5 minutes consecutively. I can do it on the treadmill, but I'm scared to try on surface streets since they are so damn hilly. Also because I take the Deen with me and she is not doing a lot better when it comes to other dogs. If I'm completely spent after 5 minutes (3 was pushing it if I was going up hill just last week!), and she sees another dog, I don't know that I can control her. But I feel bad about not exercising her with the runs and because I want to get her stamina up too for longer runs, so she needs C25k too. Anyway, that's the dilemma.
Please comment or do something so I know if people are reading this. I don't want to keep writing if I'm just talking to myself...
Showing posts with label jobs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jobs. Show all posts
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Monday, July 18, 2011
For one weekend-I was a working girl
I was so excited too! I felt empowered, like a contributing member of society. I was going to be earning my keep! I was making plans for the dog and for the money and for the company. It was heaven. I felt like I was finally where I was supposed to be.
*crash*burn*bang*
It all started the day that the BF left for training for 6 weeks (boo, hiss). That afternoon, I got a phone call from a company that I had applied to a full month before and had been really excited to work for. Since I haven't heard anything for a month and their CL ad came down, I figured that chance was over. But no! She called, had an impromptu interview on the phone (not a fan of surprise interviews, especially when you've forgotten what the job posting said). Decided to have a formal interview the next week.
The formal interview went great! It was a bit odd at times, but I figured it was just the chaos of a start-up/working mom. Most importantly, we seemed to click; it was a great, great position for me with lots of intangibles; and I was stoked. She said that if I wanted it, the job was mine at $13/hr (although she had to check with her partner). That, btw, is 26,000 annual before taxes. Average salary for entry level marketing is 39,000+ in this area (for my edu and work experience), which is $18.75/hr. I know it's a competitive job market and I know they are a start-up, but that was still a pretty low ball offer. Especially since they are almost two years old, have 7-10 employees already, and have seen huge sales growth. There is a brand new, baby, untested start-up, and then there is a young company. This was the latter.
Anyway, I got the formal (if you could call an email that) offer on Thursday afternoon. It was for $12/hr for 10hr/wk for the first month/trial period. Then it could be raised to $13/hr. And they wanted me to start on Tuesday (yep, in 3 business days).
Here is what I thought about the offer: they want to feel like they didn't give the house away in the interview. Since the one partner had offered $13 on the fly (I don't think they had a number in mind beforehand), I think they felt like I had them at a disadvantage and they wanted to take some control back. It's hard to think of another explanation for wanting to save $40 in salary, unless their financial picture wasn't as solid as I was led to believe. Or I guess they could have wanted to motivate me through the trial period by giving it a lower wage, but honestly, having a permanent and soon-to-be full time job would have been motivation enough.
Now, I'm a smart girl, who went to a very good school, and has a business degree. My school also makes damn sure that you 1) know your worth and 2) know how to ask for it (or at least that you should). $12 was less than our verbal agreement, and way less than the competing $17 offer that I told her about (less attractive for other reasons). So I responded to express my disappointment that they weren't able to offer the $13 we had discussed and that I would much prefer to start there, but if $12 is what was feasible for them, then I could work with it. I also asked that we set a particular project for the 40 hours of the trial period so that I would have something concrete to show for my time and not a bunch of little things. Also that there would be goals/metrics associated with that project to make sure that we were all on the same page and so they could use that as way to evaluate my trial period.
Finally, I suggested that the title of Marketing Associate would be a better description of the responsibilities than "Social Media Assistant." Considering that it would involve designing and implementing campaigns, researching other brands, researching customers, and just generally drumming up sales (with or without Facebook and Twitter), I thought that was reasonable. And, most importantly, free for them to do since they knew they were under-paying me.
Their response:
I don't know. Maybe I came on too strong? Maybe they just weren't ready to hire someone not from the neighborhood? And what is with the exclamation point?? It kinda says, "we like you a lot, but we just don't want you."
Mostly, I feel like a dodged a bullet. The job could have been incredible, but you never are really sure about the people that you are going to be working with. And now I know. Now I know that they don't take kindly to being... challenged? Never mind that they opened up the possibility for negotiation by making a lower offer than our verbal agreement. Pot and kettle, you know?
So now I will not be joining the work force, at least not for a little while (part time contract work and unpaid internships aside). But since it's because I won't be working for people who get huffy enough to fire you when you advocate for your own needs (nicely), I'd say it's a good deal. It's a shame though. They should have realized that the more things like titles that they give me, the more invested I am in the company, and more invested I am, the more I want it to succeed. It could have been a good deal for all of us.
Instead, I got to daydream about a job for an entire weekend.
*crash*burn*bang*
It all started the day that the BF left for training for 6 weeks (boo, hiss). That afternoon, I got a phone call from a company that I had applied to a full month before and had been really excited to work for. Since I haven't heard anything for a month and their CL ad came down, I figured that chance was over. But no! She called, had an impromptu interview on the phone (not a fan of surprise interviews, especially when you've forgotten what the job posting said). Decided to have a formal interview the next week.
The formal interview went great! It was a bit odd at times, but I figured it was just the chaos of a start-up/working mom. Most importantly, we seemed to click; it was a great, great position for me with lots of intangibles; and I was stoked. She said that if I wanted it, the job was mine at $13/hr (although she had to check with her partner). That, btw, is 26,000 annual before taxes. Average salary for entry level marketing is 39,000+ in this area (for my edu and work experience), which is $18.75/hr. I know it's a competitive job market and I know they are a start-up, but that was still a pretty low ball offer. Especially since they are almost two years old, have 7-10 employees already, and have seen huge sales growth. There is a brand new, baby, untested start-up, and then there is a young company. This was the latter.
Anyway, I got the formal (if you could call an email that) offer on Thursday afternoon. It was for $12/hr for 10hr/wk for the first month/trial period. Then it could be raised to $13/hr. And they wanted me to start on Tuesday (yep, in 3 business days).
Here is what I thought about the offer: they want to feel like they didn't give the house away in the interview. Since the one partner had offered $13 on the fly (I don't think they had a number in mind beforehand), I think they felt like I had them at a disadvantage and they wanted to take some control back. It's hard to think of another explanation for wanting to save $40 in salary, unless their financial picture wasn't as solid as I was led to believe. Or I guess they could have wanted to motivate me through the trial period by giving it a lower wage, but honestly, having a permanent and soon-to-be full time job would have been motivation enough.
Now, I'm a smart girl, who went to a very good school, and has a business degree. My school also makes damn sure that you 1) know your worth and 2) know how to ask for it (or at least that you should). $12 was less than our verbal agreement, and way less than the competing $17 offer that I told her about (less attractive for other reasons). So I responded to express my disappointment that they weren't able to offer the $13 we had discussed and that I would much prefer to start there, but if $12 is what was feasible for them, then I could work with it. I also asked that we set a particular project for the 40 hours of the trial period so that I would have something concrete to show for my time and not a bunch of little things. Also that there would be goals/metrics associated with that project to make sure that we were all on the same page and so they could use that as way to evaluate my trial period.
Finally, I suggested that the title of Marketing Associate would be a better description of the responsibilities than "Social Media Assistant." Considering that it would involve designing and implementing campaigns, researching other brands, researching customers, and just generally drumming up sales (with or without Facebook and Twitter), I thought that was reasonable. And, most importantly, free for them to do since they knew they were under-paying me.
Their response:
After reviewing your email, we have decided that we aren't open to negotiations. We have reconsidered our offer of employment to you.
We wish you much luck in your future endeavors!
I don't know. Maybe I came on too strong? Maybe they just weren't ready to hire someone not from the neighborhood? And what is with the exclamation point?? It kinda says, "we like you a lot, but we just don't want you."
Mostly, I feel like a dodged a bullet. The job could have been incredible, but you never are really sure about the people that you are going to be working with. And now I know. Now I know that they don't take kindly to being... challenged? Never mind that they opened up the possibility for negotiation by making a lower offer than our verbal agreement. Pot and kettle, you know?
So now I will not be joining the work force, at least not for a little while (part time contract work and unpaid internships aside). But since it's because I won't be working for people who get huffy enough to fire you when you advocate for your own needs (nicely), I'd say it's a good deal. It's a shame though. They should have realized that the more things like titles that they give me, the more invested I am in the company, and more invested I am, the more I want it to succeed. It could have been a good deal for all of us.
Instead, I got to daydream about a job for an entire weekend.
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